Memories
by suicidal strawberries
Summary: They were the three exceptions. They were the reason I was glad to play the cello. Sirius Black. Remus Lupin. And James Potter. They were the reason behind a lot of things for a lot of years. (Lily's POV)


Chapter One: First & Second Years

"Evans, Lily."

"Here."

I stuck my hand up quickly, and my teacher – a woman called Professor James, wasn't it? - glanced over, scanning my face and registering it as if immediately linking my image to my name.

"Ferguson, Annamarie."

"Here."

Professor James beamed at the gawky, brown-haired girl beside me. "My name is Annamarie, too! How nice!" she exclaimed. Annamarie-the-student nodded awkwardly, and I tried not to smirk - Annamarie didn't get out much, to say the very least.

"Lupin, Remus."

"Here."

Remus was tall and, I couldn't help but notice, just plain _hot_. He twitched, though, as if he had had a few too many cups of coffee that morning.

"Sako, Laura."

"Lori, please. Oh - here!"

I glanced at her. Asian girl, shorter than me, a rare occurrence, athletic build and messy black bun.

"Snape, Severus."

"Here."

I looked at Severus Snape closely, as he had been staring at me all day. Dark hair, dark eyes, a hook nose, and scary eyebrows. Thin and pale, but something mysteriously cute about him… He glanced in my direction and I looked away in a flash.

"Potter, James."

"Here."

Again, my new Transfiguration teacher looked up excitedly. "Wow! Your name is James, like my last name, and there's another Annamarie, like my first name… What a class!" James Potter rolled his eyes and smiled indulgingly. I looked him over - daring grin that looked awkward in his slightly chubby face, and messy black hair. So basically, he resembled half the boys in our school. By 'our school', I mean Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, which I had hardly begun to think of as 'home' yet. After all, I was a meager first year, and today was my first day. This class – Transfiguration - was my third of the day, and already, all I wanted was to go back to our dorm room and sleep. I was so used to getting up at 8:30 for Muggle elementary school, where I had gone before getting the letter that would change my life forever. I yawned loudly, not caring about the rest of my classmates a whole lot. I had already met my three Gryffindor room mates, and as far as I was concerned, they were all the friends I needed.

Lydia Kye was short and loud and generally crazy - she was pure Korean, and so proud of it, I could strangle her when she got going on her Asian kicks.

Kelsey Sanders was the only one in the whole school that I had known beforehand; the two of us had been friends since we were seven. When we both got our Hogwarts letters, I was shocked to discover that she had never told me about her magical roots, and _she_, in turn, was shocked that I was a witch. With that one exception, there was nothing she didn't know about me. Hell, a year or so ago, we had even tried to French-kiss each other, just to SEE. Kel had brilliant green eyes and light brown hair, and she loved swimming and acting.

Arabella Figg sat directly to my left. I glanced over at her, and she was smiling at nothing. Aria (as we called her in later years) was _always_ smiling, always happy, and always friendly and nice to anyone and everyone. She had long, straight hair, light brown with a zillion blonde highlights, and clear blue eyes. Aria and Lydia played the violin, Kelsey the clarinet, and I, the cello. I had almost played the clarinet along with Kelsey, but my parents convinced me to take up the cello instead.

It would be a long time until I realized what a good thing that was.

My nerves were shot to pieces by the time I got to my last class of the day, History of Magic, and Professor Binns' constant droning didn't help. Our instructions were to write a one-foot-long essay about our summers and have a partner edit them - writing had always been my strong point, and I finished with ease. Now for the real challenge; finding a friend to edit it. I looked around in desperation.

"Hey, wanna edit mine?"

I whipped around at the friendly voice. It was Laura Sako, from my Transfiguration class! She was a Ravenclaw, I noticed, and that meant she was in my Charms class as well.

"Yea! Sure! I'm Lily, by the way."

"I'm Lori," she smiled at me.

We swapped parchment and I read through her essay quickly. It was good. She was a fair writer, and her topic was interesting enough - it was about how her select Quidditch team had won some tournament in France that past summer. We finished editing each other's papers quickly, and I decided that Lori was someone who could match me in intelligence, another rare occurrence. Then again, she was in Ravenclaw, and Ravenclaws were often very intelligent. The sorting hat had seriously contemplated putting me in that house, but had ended up placing me in Gryffindor instead. We began to speak of other things, and I found out she played the harp, had a Muggle best friend named Mac, and giggled a _lot_. Still, I liked her, and I smiled to myself.

By the end of my first week at Hogwarts I had already made several friends, Hee-Sun Kang, Hannah Ho, Elaine Wang, and Katherine Chung.

In case you haven't noticed, nearly all of my friends were Asian.

I had vibrant red hair and emerald green eyes, so appearance-wise, you might think I was in the entirely wrong crowd. My hair was _so red_ that strangers and passers-by occasionally came up to me and asked if I died it - I didn't. My eyes, however, were truly my best feature. They were bright orbs of dazzling green, almond-shaped, and along with my hair, they were what truly made me stand out. I had rosy cheeks and freckles that hid pale skin, and I blushed constantly. Otherwise, I was stick-skinny, completely flat, and relatively short - your typical 10-year-old. I may have acted stiff and mature, but for fuck's sake, I still dotted my i's with hearts! I was pretty average, to say the least.

I often hung out with Kelsey, Aria and Lydia. There was also Tasha Bylenok, who was a short Hufflepuff, and my Herbology partner. Daisy, another Ravenclaw, grew especially close to Kelsey, but knew Lori through their common avocation of playing the harp and sleeping in the same dorm. I, too, hung out with Lori often. Bellatrix Black (we called her Bella) was another close new friend - she played the violin as well, and was in Slytherin – not that she acted like it. Her cousin, Sirius, was in Gryffindor with me…but Sirius Black's time to shine will come soon enough. Orchestra became a huge part of my life. Miranda Johnson and Zarah Hitner were my two bass-playing friends, and they got in trouble constantly for talking. They were both in Slytherin as well, but hung out with me because they weren't anything as manipulative and cruel as most of their housemates. Miranda was pale and skinny, with dark brown hair and lighter eyes. Zarah was tall and black and giggled at just about everything. Aria switched to the bass after being put in the back of the violin section, and I became first chair cellist.

Let me explain about the seating system in the Hogwarts orchestras. There are four orchestras - Beginning, Junior, Intermediate, and Senior. I was first chair - AKA the best - in Junior, and I stayed there for my first two years at Hogwarts. Beginning was for the, well, beginners; Intermediate was for all the sucky people who couldn't get into Senior; and no first years (or even second years!) made it into Senior.

Well… _Practically_ no first years made it in. There _was_ an exception or two…

Or three.

Severus Snape was second chair cellist, meaning he sat by me and was my stand partner. As the inside part of the stand, it was his job to turn the music and let me stand up before him at concerts, etc. He fought me every step of the way, and at first, I absolutely hated him and he hated me. And yet, I began to develop the hugest crush I had ever had. In spite of our constant bickering, I _knew_ we were flirting, and so did he.

I liked him. He liked me. I knew it. He knew it. Everyone else knew it.

There were challenges. And by that word, I don't mean obstacles - I mean, _challenges_. A word that would become infamous to everyone in the Hogwarts music programs. Once a week, you were allowed to announce that you were_ challenging_ someone who had a better seat than you in your section. You told them the part of a piece you wanted to play, and a week later, you both played it for Professor Smith, our conductor, to judge. Winner got the debated-over seat. Severus challenged me ceaselessly, and I won every time, much to his annoyance.

It seems difficult to believe now, but Professor Smith liked me. In first year, I liked him, too. I mean, I may have fought with Severus, but in general, I was a perfect student. I practiced, turned everything in, was quiet and respectful, and always - _always_ - had my materials. Professor Smith was, in my opinion, a bit of a goofball, but nothing more. He made weird jokes, had unusual habits, and sometimes he even sang. But he was a good conductor, and we were a fabulous orchestra. I liked that class, in spite of the troubles with Severus, who at one point told me he had a girlfriend in America (completely false) just to make me jealous…but never mind that now.

XXX

My first two years progressed averagely enough. Truth be told, a lot of first and second year is a blur. I chilled with the same crowds, fought with Severus in orchestra, and me, Miranda and Zarah dyed our hair together - Miranda and I with pink tips, and Zarah, purple streaks. I broke my toe during a dare from Lydia involving me on a broomstick (never a good idea), and my reputation as a 'gifted child' was somewhat diminished when I had to explain myself to Madame Pomfrey, our school nurse.

I sat with Miranda in Professor Stone's Potions class, making it one of my favorite classes, as it also included Lydia, Aria and Lori. Still, Miranda and I talked constantly. Miranda was _not_ a Slytherin-like person, and she would bemoan the fact that she had to share her living quarters with such people. She stayed far closer to me and my friends, and we were all better off that way. Still, our talking subsequently inflicted the wrath of Professor Stone on an almost daily basis. Eventually, he lost it and moved me to the front table - where I sat with Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, and Severus himself. It was quite funny that those three used to be such great friends, considering in out later years at Hogwarts, Remus and Sirius despised Severus with all their might…but back to the point. Mostly I talked with Severus, as he was my current interest, although I would pause occasionally to laugh at Remus and Sirius.

Let's return to orchestra. For my first and second years, there were five cellists; myself, Severus, a fourth year named Jay who matters little, a third year named Roslyn who matters even less, and Lucius Malfoy. Lucius was Severus' best friend, and on May 6th, 1971, he asked me out.

I was standing by my locker after school, putting my stuff away as usual.

"Hey! Lily!"

I turned around to see Severus and Lucius. It was Severus who had called my name, and I was momentarily shocked that he had used 'Lily' instead of 'Hey, YOU!' as he usually did, just to bother me. Severus elbowed Lucius furiously, and the shyer boy (who was later to become the biggest asshole in Hogwarts history) stumbled forward.

"Umm…will you go out with me?"

I thought it was a dare. A dare or a joke, I assumed, and laughing, I said, "No!" as nastily as I could. I spun on my heel and strode off, down the hall and up the stairs.

It was later that night that I found out he wasn't actually joking.

So, after frenzied conferences with Severus, Aria and Bella, who knew Lucius well and who I had grown to trust immensely, I talked to Lucius. I apologized, explained myself, and changed my answer to yes. Well, you know how young Hogwarts relationships are - or maybe you don't? If that's the case, allow me. You're under the label. Everyone talks about you and spreads rumors about you as a couple, but you need never talk to each other, ESPECIALLY not outside of classes. And Lucius and I didn't. We sat together in Defense against the Dark Arts and Potions, and he always stopped by my dorm room after school. If Severus was absent, we shared a stand in orchestra. Past that? Nothing.

Luckily, that was a phase that ended sometime over winter break in second year, when all of our friends gave up. You see, before that, both my friends and Lucius' had constantly pressured us to do stuff together. "Go walk with Lucius, Lily!" "Lucius, you had better do shit with Lily this summer…" "He's YOUR boyfriend!" "She's YOUR girlfriend!" What IS it with obsessed friends leeching off the love lives of their closest pals? If my own companions had had their way, I would constantly walk, talk, sit and stand with Lucius. I couldn't handle the constant expectation that I was to spend every single living, breathing fucking moment with him…so when the spring of second year came and we were officially kaput, I couldn't've been more relieved.

But we're not there just yet. I haven't even _begun_ to describe three of the most important people in this story, and I don't mean to diminish their importance just because they weren't around much in my two years, the least eventful of all my time at Hogwarts.

We called them the Three Stooges, and _they_ were the three exceptions. _They_ were the reason I was always glad to play the cello. The Three Stooges were the reason behind a lot of things for a lot of years, and those three boys have influenced my life more than they can ever know - more than they _will_ ever know. I heard their names often in first year, and I knew two of them on an acquaintances-only basis.

_Sirius Black_. Always the leader. Always. He was an incredible cellist, and that's the understatement of the year. He had been playing since the age of three - at least seven years longer than me - and he was sheer brilliance; first chair, Senior Orchestra, first year, thank you _very _much! He had silky short black hair, huge, dark brown puppy-dog eyes, with smooth skin and straight, white, white teeth. Skinny and tanned and tall, and all together drool-worthy. He wasn't perfect, though, and I don't mean to make it sound as if he was. Sirius' ears turned a fabulous shade of red when he was embarrassed, he was the worst Quodpot (the American alternative to Quidditch we were sometimes forced to play in flying lessons) player I'd ever seen, and this one time during the O.W.L.'s… Well, you'll see soon enough. Besides the many embarrassing moments of his I've lived through, he's not very smart and he talks to himself. He was funny, he was quirky, and sometimes he was just plain _odd_ – but never so much as some of the guys you'll be hearing about shortly.

_Remus Lupin_. The sweetest and smartest of the bunch, and also the only one with morals. His pale brown hair and light blue eyes made him fairly hot, but he often came off as on the brink of exhaustion. He had a nice body, but as I may have mentioned before…he twitched. He twitched when he played the cello, when he walked, when he would ask me if I was friends with Lori. Yes, he and Lori had the hugest, sweetest crushes on each other for a lot of first year, and I'm proud to say I played a large part in getting them together by second year. Sadly, the relationship ended a few months into third year…but that's longer than most. He was always the sweet, sensitive one who you could talk to without worry of looking stupid. And yet, he was a _musical genius_. Notice I don't say _child prodigy_, which was what Sirius was - for Sirius was absolutely The Best at the cello. Remus wasn't nearly as good as Sirius, but Remus was a brilliant pianist. Oh, and he could play the guitar and the electric bass better than basically anyone else. He excelled at not just one instrument, but four; so it hardly mattered that he wasn't _the_ best at any of them. I love Remus. I mean, I love Sirius, too, just because he's _Sirius_, and half of my memories involve him, but Remus…he fades out around 4th year and after that, I hardly saw him. And I missed him. He was always the one who acted so confident, and was really the most sensitive and self-conscious guy underneath the façade. I miss Remus, and I feel so sorry for him, too. He will always have a special place in my heart - but then again, all of the stooges will.

_James Potter._ It sends chills up and down my spine, just typing that name. Why? It won't make sense to anyone but me, and possibly my closest friends. After all, James's musical abilities were far less than Sirius and Remus' - I don't really understand how on earth he got into Senior Orchestra in first year, truth be told. None of the stooges were terribly intelligent, so James was certainly not any smarter. And - I don't mean to be superficial or cruel here - but James wasn't sexy like Sirius, or hot like Remus. James could be described as cute, at best in the first couple of years. He grew out of it over time, but he was…not chubby, but round-faced. He had messy black hair, and green eyes just like me. He had glasses and a crooked nose, but… What WAS it about James? To me, he always seemed quirkily cute, although no one else agreed. My history with James is especially interesting, but again, that'll come later…all in good time. James was hilarious. Let it be said; he was the _only _person who could _always_ make me laugh, no matter what. Perhaps that was why he was my favorite. I could go on and on about James forever, and I probably will, later on. Most of this story revolves around him, so don't worry - you won't be lacking James stories.

By the end of second year I was progressing in my musical abilities, but was scared shitless to try out for Senior Orchestra. But I did, and I got 4th chair - right behind the Three Stooges, and James's stand partner. I first met my newest section-mates at the end of June in second year – next year's Senior was getting together to rehearse for the upcoming Graduation ceremony we would be playing at. My friend Daisy, the harpist, had a raging crush on James - I honestly couldn't care less. Miranda had also liked him for a time, but I really had no idea who he was.

I walked over and sat down by him, beginning to set up. He, on the other hand, was caressing his cello.

I stared blankly. Wouldn't you have done the same?

"Nice curves," he said, grinning at me.

I stared harder.

He motioned to his cello. "If it was a human, that is…" he finished rather sadly.

I shook my head and looked away. At that point in time, I was still obsessed with Lucius and Severus, and I had better things to worry about than James. Ah, the irony…

That was my very first impression of him - a perverted freak - and it stuck with me. My second impression was hardly any better. In some skewed attempt at flirting, Daisy threw a bit of candy at his head, and he ate it without complaint. Daisy exclaimed, "EWW! That was on the floor!" James answered, "Well, eating things that are thrown at my head is an instinct…" Daisy said, "So if I threw Lily at your head, you would eat her?" James stared at me before saying, "Yea. Sure."

What was I supposed to think of him?

XXX


End file.
